The Sacrifice of Change
“Ang, I'm going to change”
“Im sorry Ang, it won’t happen again”
Can you think of a time that someone offended you, continuously? When confronted, they offer you the same lame apology. They may change for a time, but lasting change does not happen until there is a renewed mindset. When the mind has a new understanding, a new behavior will follow suit naturally. Apologies have no value without new behaviors - the realest apology is changed behavior.
When change shows up, everyone will know it just entered the room.
Authentic change doesn’t need an introduction. It doesn’t require an audience or anybody to approve of it. Long lasting change - the kind that shifts one's aura - starts with a change in the way we think. When you change from within, new behaviors become natural reactions to life.
When change shows up, everyone will know it just entered the room. We often see this when someone is fed up with the pain from the undesired outcome.
The largest topic I encounter with people is wanting a change in their relationship. My response is always, “you must be willing to become the miracle that you are seeking”. To experience a miracle in the area of relationships, the cost is going to be one of sacrifice. For the most part, you will be sacrificing immediate gratification. In relationships, you bring yourself into the relationship and are a part of your own dilemma. Another way of seeing this is, you have fifty cents in that dollar.
Let me prepare you for the sacrifice. You will be triggered often in the process of change. Your sacrifice is not to grow weary in this journey. It will take some time for your new mindset and behavior to become apparent to the other person. Therefore, their behavior will remain the same and will offer you the same experience as yesterday. However, part of your sacrifice is to not react. When you react, you will have to start your process all over again. The very change you desire requires the sacrifice of giving others the needed space and the needed time. Be mindful, you don’t trigger them in the same manner as they trigger you. Therefore, they will be resistant to change. But, if they aren’t getting the response they are used to, they will change by default.
This will be the most rewarding work you will do on yourself. You will be out of your comfort zone and that creates mental anguish and possible fatigue. I encourage you to do it anyway. The investment in self control and continued growth is worth it. Just remember, give yourself and others space and time.
Change aint’ change, until it’s changed.